12. Bed Rest

I'm 25. My biological clock is ticking (just ask my mom...) Just kidding- I think we both know its going to be a VERY long time before my uterus gets a tenant. And after this book - add 5 years to that.

Bed Rest was the story of... get this... a pregnant lady on (wait for it..) bed rest! I didn't really have many expectations when I started reading. I picked this book up for two reasons: It was short (and lets face it, I'm behind in my reading) and there was a bowl of ice cream on the cover (even if it was resting on a pregnant belly- it's still ice cream). It was a fairly intense read at the beginning: with a medical emergency and the flustered scramble to get life settled within in the confines of a tiny Manhattan apartment. Then, the story developed and the ugly truth about what pregnancy is like came to light. I was a little bit surprised. You have to go through THAT when you're pregnant?

No thanks. This is precisely the reason I will be in a committed marriage when I start having little ones- I can blame my husband for all the gross, horrible stuff and he can't leave me. (Whoever you are- I love you and I'm just kidding and I won't be that mean when I'm preggo... I don't think...)

All single-girl-gagging aside, this was a very fun novel. There, of course, was the British lead character (which didn't speak in the lingo I enjoy but was entertaining nonetheless), the shocking love triangle, and a happy ending. I also enjoyed this story because I think Q (the lead character) acted like I would given the circumstances- even though she was confined to her sofa- she was able to stay entertained and gave no excuses when her hormones got the best of her. Sarah Bilston did well with this cute little novel. If you're looking for a quick, easy read (for some reason- airplanes come to mind) get this one. Its quirky and a little sickly sweet (minus the gross stuff, but if you've had a baby you know all about that. I prefer to remain naive. Gag.)

On a side note, I think I'll make my font blue.. cause if I have a baby in the next decade.. I hope its a boy. Girls are ridiculous.

12/52 Books (Currently 5 behind... Oops!)
3678 Pages Read.

11. It's Kind Of A Funny Story

When your mom and your best friend both loan you copies of the same book within a few weeks of one another- its a sign you 1) either will love the book because they did or 2) they are trying to tell you something. I think the first was true in this case (I'm not sure mom actually read more than the dust jacket but she knows my reading style pretty well) but when I read this book I found myself completely identifying with the lead character and while I don't THINK my mom and Katy were trying to tell me anything about my mental state- this book sure did and I, in a round about way, it saved me.

First I must start by saying- I'm not a suicidal person. I never have been and Lord willing I'll never feel like I should go down that road but it's not secret that I've had a few battles with depression in my life. This admission might cause you to shudder away from the screen, skim the rest of this review and maybe feel a little bit embarrassed for me. Don't. In our society depression is a taboo subject. I don't believe in taboo subject. I believe in self education. I believe in honest discussions. I believe in exploring your feelings and making yourself a better person. I don't believe in hiding the truth because it might make others feel uncomfortable. Like I said in a previous blog entry- if you feel that you are not mature enough to handle a discussion on this subject matter- this book and particular entry may not be for you.

I'll start this particular entry by answering one question: Why was I depressed? Simple stuff really, much like Craig, the lead character in It's Kind of a Funny Story. Craig had worked so hard to be admitted to a prestigious high school and once he got there he began to panic - the work was tough, there was no room for failure. He panicked about the same things I did during my freshman year of college. Craig became obsessed with his depression and became dependent on Zoloft. In all honesty, I took Zoloft for a while too but found my depression was better managed in other ways (Plus I gained weight like crazy on that particular drug- it was hard enough already being sad and frustrated- I didn't like curvier curves on top of that!) No harm in admitting one needs help occasionally. Some people need a little caffeine to get through the day, some people need something a little bit stronger. Over the past few years I've done a pretty good job of maintaining my mental health with a few setbacks: The death of a very close friend due to tragic circumstances left me reeling; a little later there was the situation with a peeping tom I felt I had to hide from my family and close friends; then... more recently, self inflicted unemployment and shift in personal goals made me completely question everything in my life. When I read this book-I was feeling pretty sorry for myself that I couldn't find the type of employment I craved. It took me a few days, some intense exercise and a few friends who helped me figure some things out. (Thanks guys) It also helped to read about someone who overcame his much more brutal battle. Craig, in spite of his pharmaceutical help, became consumed by his condition. He became obsessed with the things and series of things that caused him to feel like he was losing control. He could no longer eat. He could no longer function during the day and one night he decided he had two options: He could commit suicide or call a suicide hot-line. Thankfully he chose the latter.

Ned Vizzini created an amazing story, based on his own personal battle, when he created this intricate web of truth, struggles and human emotions. This novel, however, has one tragic flaw- it's too good. How many depressed teenagers have parents willing to drop money the second their child asks to speak to a therapist? How many would even THINK their child might be depressed unless the child came out and admitted it? How many parents would try to blame the child "well if you hadn't..." or make matters worse "If you'd just try harder..."? How many teenagers, when their friend ends up in a psychiatric ward would admit to their own depression and even come visit their ailing friend? The truth is- this book is FANTASTIC but it's a little sugar coated. These things don't happen. In our day and age those suffering from depression, or equally taboo conditions, are made to feel like outcasts. Here's the truth though: EVERYONE HAS BAD DAYS! Everyone struggles at some point in their life. If you go through life pooping rainbows and sounding like a fairy princess from a Disney movie- chances are... well no chances: You're fake and you're hiding something and I feel sorry for you. Be true to yourself. Why do we make people feel bad for feeling bad? Why do we need people to be happy for our own sakes? There is something refreshingly beautiful about people who admit how they feel and deal with it.

This is the deal among my friends: This week I'm going to call you crying, you'll help me see that things really aren't so bad and then next week, when you call me in tears- I'll do the same for you. It is such a gift to be able to be there for my friends and know that when I need them, they won't judge me or ask questions, they'll just help me see the silver lining.

I guess this review was not so much a review and more a social commentary, but this book really made me think and made me really understand the need to be open about everything in my life, the awesome stuff and struggles alike. If you or someone you know suffers from depression- take a look at this novel. It truly does explore what goes on in the mind of someone who's struggling and maybe gives a little hope for those who need to see a happy ending.

Pick it up. It's a good one.


11/52 Books (Currently 6 behind... Oops!)
3463 Pages Read.

10. Bare Necessity

It's rare I find a book that I have to force myself to put down in order to carry on normal daily activities, you know- eating, drinking, showering- but I get so excited when I do!

First of all- I LOVE chick lit. Anything that's fun and girly, light and airy, and evolves a juicy love triangle is okay in my book, but what makes that better is if the novel is set in England. There is just something classier about those love triangles when the involved parties argue about their situations over a "cuppa" (a cup of tea) and say fun things like "bloke", "mate", "bloody", "Bullocks" and "knackered". Carole Matthews made Bare Necessity a fun read for me because even though England's English is much different than American English I was still able to identify each character's voice. That's important in a good book.

I think the most bizarre part of identifying these voices was the fact that the bad guy- the jerk, the guy who posted his girlfriend's dirty picture online without her knowledge- in my head, he spoke just like every guy I know. I don't know if its just my perception of English gentlemen but I could not bring myself to have his disgusting, filthy excuses be spoken in such a beautiful accent. I'm pretty sure the author didn't intend for him to be American... but buddy, he sure was in my mind.

So, obviously now you know know this story is centered around a possibly questionable photo making its way onto the internet. In this story, these characters must decide if this photograph was justifiable in its intended setting, who was at fault for the photo being taken in the first place and then when it ending up online and why you'd even take such photos in the first place. In America- the young woman pictured would have been labeled a whore and would have been quick to sue the young man who made images of her body available to anyone on the web. Stories like this make their way into the media everyday in our society. The battles are nasty and public and neither party comes out a winner.

I think this story has a different twist (of course Brits have a way of making everything look a little classier.) While this becomes a public battle, the young woman is able to twist the story and win her name back- in a certain sense- and makes quite the comeback.

This is one of the more fun books I've read during this year long experiment, but I wasn't quite aware of what I was getting into when I started the reading- you can only learn so much from a book jacket. This book did take a look into pornography (albeit a minor look) and the content might make some uncomfortable. There was also a new-age character who practiced Wicca and openly cast spells. Being a twenty-five year old woman I can read such subject matter with a mature mind and understand that my (conservative) way of life isn't for everyone and some people live different lifestyles than I do. However, I'll warn that if you cannot read books such as this one with an open mind- you might be better off picking a different selection.


10/52 Books (Currently 6 behind... Oops!)
3019 Pages Read.

9. Gump & Co.

"Lieutenant Dan got me invested in some kind of fruit company.
So then I got a call from him, saying
we don't have to worry about money no more.
I said, that's good. One less thing. "

It's no secret I love Forrest Gump so I'll refrain from my usual gushing (I'D SO MARRY HIMinaheartbeatwithnoshoeson!!!!) and commence with a review on a second book following his life: Gump & Co. by Winston Grooms (published in 1995, one year after the movie was released). At first I was annoyed- I didn't remember Forrest using such bad language in the movie, but like I said just yesterday YOU CAN'T JUDGE A BOOK BY IT'S MOVIE!!!!

In all honesty, I've never read the original Forrest Gump novel, so all I have to base my judgements on is the fact that I thought that movie is the best movie EVER made and anything below that would be a disappointment. I had to get over that real fast! Apparently in the original book Jenny doesn't die, marries someone else and Little Forrest isn't aware that Forrest Sr. is his biological sperm donor. HOLD UP! What? I was so confused. Part of my basis for loving Forrest in the first place is his devotion to Jenny and his son. It was hard to push that aside and let this story take me elsewhere.

I also found it so disheartening that Mr. Grooms choose to call Forrest an "idiot" every chance he got. I do not like how he was played as the village fool nor do I like how he was criticized and repeatedly made a national scapegoat in this book. I don't see Forrest as an idiot at all - and if he is, then every male I know is an idiot too. I don't think his mentality really had all that much to do with his I.Q. its more of a southern thing. We talk slower here, we take our time, we trust people a way too much. I don't think Forrest is an idiot, I think he's just a regular good old southern boy who might just be a little more naive than the rest of us. In way... I think he's just the male version of Rose Nylund.

I think it unfortunate that Mr. Grooms took so many liberties with this book. While it is funny that Forrest worked for The Bakers (of the Tammy Faye variety) and captured Saddam Hussein during the first Gulf War, only to be told to return him, some things were just too far out there. Remember in the movie (I know, I'm doing it again) when he haphazardly falls into the Watergate Scandal and "accidentally" speaks to thousands in Washington? Those things were hilarious and ironic. Now, not having read the first book, I don't know if the author was as obvious as he was in Gump & Co. or if maybe reading these scenes just isn't as effective as seeing them on the big screen- but I was sorely disappointed. They were too drawn out, too obvious. It's hard to take a situation seriously when you can see whats going to happen from a mile away. I like when Forrest EASES into a situation- not falls into it face first and is made to be the village idiot. I'll let you read the book and see for yourself what instances I'm talking about....

But I particularly liked the ended- very much what I'd expect from a Forrest tale. He was lovable and natural and Grooms offered exactly what I expected- not flamboyancy but irony....I even liked the appearance from Bill Clinton. Quite humorous.

Read this one with an open mind- although, once you get used to the vernacular and can hear Forrest (a la Tom Hanks or your favorite hot boy who has the accent down to a science. Ahem.... ) telling you the story- I think you'll find this a pleasant and enjoyable surprise.

Don't worry Mom, I'll return your book... I kinda stole it from your shelf last time I was home!

9/52 Books (Currently 7 behind... Oops!)
2646 Pages Read.

8. GESUNDHEIT!

I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
A million times over I'm sorry!!!!

Many people have asked me when my next review is coming and because of that- I fought my way through this book. Just. For. You. You have no idea how much I wanted to walk away from this last selection but I didn't. I kept it next to my bed and read it whenever I could find it inside myself to crack open the cover. This is why it has taken me 8 weeks to read a book that is only 193 pages. It normally doesn't take me 80 minutes to read a book that short. For reasons to later be discussed this one beat the living daylights out of me, it made me sleep after just a few paragraphs (which I took advantage of more than once) and it made my head hurt with its redundancy... but I did it! GESUNDHEIT! By Patch Adams M.D. with Maureen Mylander is finished! Here are my thoughts.

Never, ever - no matter how much you want to- just don't judge a book by it's movie. While I fully condone judging a book by its cover, a movie is a completely different story - literally. I saw the movie in the theaters when I was in middle school and I fell in love with the character of Patch Adams (even though he was slightly inappropriate) and his fight to create a free hospital. I thought the story was sad and endearing and the battle for free medical care was something we should all get behind... okay so that part is a lie, I just thought it was a good story, free medical care really has no baring on the mind of a 14-year-old girl.

I thought (THOUGHT) I knew this story, so when I found the book, I bought it.

This book started out in the most phenomenal way- with the retelling of Patch Adam's life and vividly I could see Robin Williams prancing around in mental wards and medical school- on his way to brilliancy and then the tides changed and when I say "changed" I mean this book went from being a small current in Whipporwill Creek to being a tsunami that made me want to let go of the door I was clinging to and just give up. This was not a biography as I previously though but rather a ted.i.ous dissection of everything that is wrong with the world of medicine and what "cancers" are destroying what might be the oldest profession known to man. I cannot give you a word to tell you what this reading experience was like was like. We'll start with the positives:

Reasons to read Gesundheit!

1. The discussion about third party reimbursement in the medical field. This is a huge issue in our country right now. This may have been a reason I was both horrified and fascinated by this book. In my mind I kept thinking "if he brings up insurance one more time..." but at the same time I was desperate to learn more. I want to be an American who can come to an informed decision about her rights. Could this guys approach to health care be what our country is searching for? I think it could be- in some respects. In med school Adams was told "Don't worry about it, he's insured." This led to over-testing and overdoing procedures. As a result:
"The hospital supply companies and medical technology firms have become multibillion dollar moguls of medicine". I really like where he said "If the current health insurance system is failing, many observers say, lets' solve the problem with universal health insurance. Don't address the staggering costs, just ask the federal government to pay! But universal health insurance will never cut cost; it will only make them higher. I shudder at the further losses our health care system will suffer if universal insurance becomes law."
What Dr. Adams had to say about this really made me think- even though this was written years before our current debate. This discussion is covered on Pg. 41 if you are interested in reading more.

2. Communal Living is Weird. Isn't it a tiny bit fascinating to learn more about something we don't practice? I'm a little bit obsessed with the Amish way of living so the idea of a self-sufficient society is bizarre and odd and interesting to me. Its great for doctors to be so in love with their profession to be able to live and breathe their jobs-but there is such a thing as taking stuff to far. The guys, including Dr. Adams, involved in the Gusundheit! Project worked and lived within a commune (I lived at a camp one summer- I have a preconceived notion that communes smell really bad). In a way, I think that's taking medical care a bit too far but it seemed to work for this group and I think it was great they were able to pool their resources- financially and medically and create a really interesting and successful format for healing. Some of the stories ( I don't honestly think they were stories... I think they were Dr. Adams saying we should live in huddled masses) were disgusting. If my husband was a doctor and chose to live in a commune and then encouraged me to "give birth before an audience of our family and friends" I'd have to hit him. That's just.... not even right.

3. What is your relationship with physician? Patch has a philosophy that all your doctor should be your friend. "Our ideal patient will be one who wants a deep personal friendship for life." Pg. 54 Dr. Adams believes that the closer you are with your doctor, the more open you will be about the true nature of your symptoms. "Please come prepared for interactions with your healer. Examine your life, talk with friends and family, and arrive with as broad an understanding of yourself and your needs as possible. Bring a list of questions and insist on their being answered. Please exclude nothing- and remember, you are worth all this attention." Pg. 64 I find this to be a very valid point. The person you trust to heal your body should know the most about you right? So why do we tell our friends things that we don't tell our doctors? Why are we scared to be open with these health care professionals? Why do we treat them like strangers? If we truly trust them with our health- they should be our friends.

4. Re-activeness vs. Pro-activeness. "One reason we have such a costly health care system is that it offers little if any emphasis on preventive medicine. Relatively little money is spent on preventive medical services, and health insurers give minimal reimbursement for wellness counseling. Hospitals survive and prosper when people are sick; they are not designed to thrive with empty beds when people are healthy." Pg.52 In college there was a textbook that I fell in love with because it had an entire section devoted to pro-activeness vs. re-activeness. Its something that we all need to evaluate in our lives. Why do we sit around and wait for things to happen to us? We know that eating poorly raises our health risks. We know that H1N1 is incredibly contagious or that cold season is just around the corner... yet, we all love our Big Macs and refuse to get shots because it will hurt or don't take our vitamins because we "forget"... oddly enough- I know exactly what time all my favorite shows are on.

5. Isn't your health care your whole environment? "A more effective approach to health care, by contrast, would base care in local health centers and programs, use technology as supportive therapy when necessary, focus on preventive, and support both alternative and conventional healing methods. It would accept dealt when it is inevitable, value quality of life, use community development approaches, protect the "victim," promote self-care, and be environmentally sensitive." Pg 52. Not only is it important to have a personal relationship with your health care providers but it is important to understand that your body is just part of your actual health. If a doctor does not know about stresses in your life or is not aware of great changes in your lifestyle or habitat then he cannot fully treat you. All aspects of your life- your friends, your family, your home, your pets, your diet, your job, your likes and dislikes make you who you are and can greatly influence your health- recognizing this and sharing it with your doctor makes your health care experience that much more valuable.

So maybe this book was a bit of a learning experience- I did learn alot about taking control of my own health... but this book still left a bad taste in my mouth. Why?

Reasons to NOT read Gesundheit!

1. Redundancy. Most of the above points are made in the first few chapters... and then repeated with reckless abandon throughout the rest of the book...over and over and over and over and over again.

2. Did I mention he likes to repeat himself? A lot?

It was exhausting!

8/52 Books (Currently 8 behind... Oops!)
2404 Pages Read.

The next review is coming SOON I promise!